F*CKING FABULOUS |HERBAL TEA BLEND 60g

F_CKING FABULOUS HERBAL TEA BLEND™ 🖤🔥👑*

F_cking Fabulous Herbal Tea Blend™ with Functional Mushrooms

_A Sovereign ritual in a cup. 22 herbs. Reishi. Lions Mane._

 *PRODUCT DESCRIPTION*

*This is not just tea.*
*It’s your Crown, steeped.*

*F_CKING FABULOUS™* is a micro-batch, 22-herb blend handcrafted in Adelaide for the woman who is done asking permission.

No fillers. No fluff. No apologies.
Just a daily ritual for the Queen entering her villain era.

*What it is:*
A vegan, caffeine free herbal tea with functional mushrooms. Hand-blended in small batches.

*What it’s not:*
A therapeutic good. A medical treatment. A promise. You don’t need one. You are the promise.

*This is REIGN in a cup.*

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*THE RITUAL*
22 herbs including Nettle, Lemon Myrtle, Reishi + Lions Mane mushroom. Brew. Sip. Crown on.

*THE STANDARD*
Vegan. Caffeine free. Handcrafted in Adelaide, South Australia. Micro-batch only. When she’s gone, she’s gone.

*THE PRACTICE*
Steep 7-10 minutes. 1-2 cups daily as part of your self-care ritual. Watch it turn blue, then gold. That’s your shadow signing a contract.

*THE DISCLAIMER*
This product is a food for culinary use. Not a therapeutic good. Not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. If symptoms persist, talk to your health professional.

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 *HOW TO USE*

*1. INVOKE*
Add 1 level teaspoon to your favourite strainer or teapot.

*2. ALCHEMIZE*
Pour 250mL boiling water over herbs. Steep 7-10 minutes.

*3. REIGN*
Sip slowly. Put your Crown back on. Proceed accordingly.

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*Allergen Statement:* Packed in a facility that handles tree nuts, sesame, and soy.
*Storage:* Store below 25°C in a cool, dry place away from direct sunlight.

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*FAQ: CROWN EDITION*

*Is this menopause tea?*
It’s a herbal tea blend. We don’t make therapeutic claims. You make the connection. For health advice, talk to your GP. For power, talk to your Crown.

*Does it have caffeine?*
No. Caffeine free. Dark Feminine doesn’t need a stimulant to cause a scene.

*Can I drink this with my meds?*We’re tea witches, not your GP. Check with your healthcare provider before mixing Crowns and prescriptions

*How long does one bag last?*
60g net gives you approx. 20-25 cups. One bag = 3-4 weeks of daily ritual.

*Why Micro batch?*
Scarcity is a standard. Access to me is not a right. It’s a privilege with terms, conditions, and a non-refundable fee.

*Returns?*
Dark Feminine doesn’t take back her power. All sales final on opened food products. Choose wisely. 

*What it is:*
A ritual. A rebellion. A reminder that you are loved, hot, and priced accordingly.

*What it’s not:*
A medical treatment. A miracle.  

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*INGREDIENTS*
Nettle leaf, Lemon myrtle, Fennel seeds, Butterfly pea, Lions Mane mushroom, Ginger, Lady's mantle, Burdock root, Pine needles, Reishi mushroom, Milk thistle, Moringa leaf, Chaste berries, Gotu kola, Roasted dandelion root, Rosehip, Willow bark, Saw palmetto, Maca, Gymnema, Lemongrass, Peppermint.

_Crafted in Adelaide, South Australia. Small batch. Big energy._

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*HOW TO USE: THE RITUAL*
*1. INVOKE*
1 tsp per cup. Boil water. Breathe. You are not asking. You are commanding.

*2. ALCHEMIZE*
Steep 7-10 minutes. Watch it turn blue, then gold. That’s your shadow signing a business deal.

*3. REIGN*
Sip. Put your Crown back on. Watch who leaves.

Drink 1-2 cups daily. Best served with a boundary and no explanation.

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*This is REIGN in a cup.* 🖤🔥👑

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*SHIPPING + RETURNS*
Ships from Adelaide. Australia-wide only.
No returns on opened tea. Dark ķ doesn’t take back her power. Neither do we.
For health questions, consult your healthcare provider.

*DISCLAIMER*
This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Information provided is for ritual + entertainment purposes. Always seek advice from a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical condition.